ASSISTANT: Moz, you know with all this hysterical BLM hype at the moment, I think it's a good time to do a few damage limitation gestures on Moz Official.
MOZ (puzzled): But gestures of that nature would be completely empty. BLM is an anti-white hate group, isn't it?
ASSISTANT: Yes, but sometimes you have to go along with whatever the media tells us is fashionable. A little virtue signalling might do your public image the world of good. Do you really want to remain a lone black sheep forever?
MOZ: But I've always been an outsider. I'm perfectly comfortable with that.
ASSISTANT: Yes, but virtue signalling is what people do now - it's a part of everyday life.
MOZ: Do we have to?
ASSISTANT: Trust me on this.
MOZ (wearily): Oh, go on then. But leave me out of it. (He gazes nostalgically): I much preferred the old days when one didn't have to even entertain such ideas.
ASSISTANT: Yes, but as I say, it's all in your best interests.
MOZ (turning back to his James Baldwin novel): Now don't bother me about that silly Moz Official website again - unless I give you a personally signed statement to post up - which only happens occasionally.
ASSISTANT: That reminds me, I've got some Kenneth Williams and Charles Hawtrey shots photoshopped with the Dog on Chain LP, can I post them up? (Joins hands in supplication): Pleeeeeze Moz, pleeeeze...
MOZ (exasperated): Arrrgh, whatever, do what you have to do, just let me read in peace.